| Cold Opening | Five Easy Pieces '89 |
| Nora Dunn | ... | clerk |
| Phil Hartman | ... | Jack Nicholson Live |
| Victoria Jackson | ... | escort |
⁕The "Live from New York" portion of this sketch is replaced with the dress rehearsal version in reruns.
| Cold Opening | Five Easy Pieces '89 |
| Nora Dunn | ... | clerk |
| Phil Hartman | ... | Jack Nicholson Live |
| Victoria Jackson | ... | escort |
⁕The "Live from New York" portion of this sketch is replaced with the dress rehearsal version in reruns.