| Cold Opening | Presidential Address |
| Sketch | Ex-Boyfriend |
| Musical Performance | "Brother Jake" |
| Sketch | Talking Through Touch |
| Sketch | Mustang Calhoun |
| Musical Performance | "River of Life" |
| Film | SchillerVision Theatre Christmas Spectacular |
| Cold Opening | Presidential Address |
| Dana Carvey | ... | George Bush Live |
| Don Pardo | ... | announcer Voice |
| Commercial |
| Dana Carvey | ... | singer |
| Phil Hartman | ... | singer |
| Jan Hooks | ... | singer |
| Victoria Jackson | ... | singer |
| Mike Myers | ... | singer |
| Julia Sweeney | ... | singer |
| Show |
| Phil Hartman | ... | Hoyt Mallory |
| Jan Hooks | ... | Sally Jessy Raphael |
| Victoria Jackson | ... | audience member |
| Mike Myers | ... | Tony Kellog |
| Kevin Nealon | ... | Russ |
| Julia Sweeney | ... | audience member |
| Rob Schneider | ... | audience member |
| Sketch | Ex-Boyfriend |
| Jan Hooks | ... | Mrs. Langley |
| Victoria Jackson | ... | Shelley |
| Kevin Nealon | ... | Mr. Langley |
| Adam Sandler | ... | Kyle |
| Sketch | Talking Through Touch |
| Phil Hartman | ... | Kenneth Holter |
| Jan Hooks | ... | Carolyn Holter |
| Victoria Jackson | ... | Barb Brennan |
| Mike Myers | ... | Ernie Hitchens |
| Kevin Nealon | ... | Chuck Brennan |
| Chris Farley | ... | Ned Crowley |
| Sketch | Mustang Calhoun |
| Phil Hartman | ... | general |
| Victoria Jackson | ... | girlfriend |
| Kevin Nealon | ... | lieutenant |
| Film | SchillerVision Theatre Christmas Spectacular |
| Tom Schiller | ... | Able Johnson |
| Tom Schiller | ... | Trevor Duncan |
| Film | SchillerVision Theatre Christmas Spectacular |
| Michael J. Anderson | ... | kid |
| Andy Murphy | ... | Santa Claus |
| Cold Opening | Presidential Address |
| Dana Carvey | ... | George Bush#22 Live |
| Don Pardo | ... | announcer Voice |
| Commercial |
| John Henry Kurtz | ... | announcer Voice |
| Dana Carvey | ... | singer |
| Phil Hartman | ... | singer |
| Jan Hooks | ... | singer |
| Victoria Jackson | ... | singer |
| Mike Myers | ... | singer |
| Julia Sweeney | ... | singer |
| Show |
| Dennis Quaid | ... | Patrick Calley |
| Robin Ruzan | ... | audience member |
| Phil Hartman | ... | Hoyt Mallory |
| Jan Hooks | ... | Sally Jessy Raphael#1 |
| Victoria Jackson | ... | audience member |
| Mike Myers | ... | Tony Kellog |
| Kevin Nealon | ... | Russ |
| Julia Sweeney | ... | audience member |
| Rob Schneider | ... | audience member |
| Sketch | Ex-Boyfriend |
| Dennis Quaid | ... | Gary |
| Jan Hooks | ... | Mrs. Langley |
| Victoria Jackson | ... | Shelley |
| Kevin Nealon | ... | Mr. Langley |
| Adam Sandler | ... | Kyle |
♬The Paris Sisters - "I Love How You Love Me"
| Weekend Update |
| Dennis Miller | ||
| Jon Lovitz | ... | Annoying Man#7 |
| Dana Carvey | ... | Grumpy Old Man#6 |
| William Clotworthy | Still |
♬Todd Rundgren - "I Saw the Light"
| Sketch | Talking Through Touch |
| Dennis Quaid | ... | Todd Skyler |
| Phil Hartman | ... | Kenneth Holter |
| Jan Hooks | ... | Carolyn Holter |
| Victoria Jackson | ... | Barb Brennan |
| Mike Myers | ... | Ernie Hitchens#1 |
| Kevin Nealon | ... | Chuck Brennan |
| Chris Farley | ... | Ned Crowley#1 |
⁕Most of this sketch is replaced with the dress rehearsal version in reruns.
| Sketch | Mustang Calhoun |
| Dennis Quaid | ... | Mustang Calhoun |
| Phil Hartman | ... | general |
| Victoria Jackson | ... | girlfriend |
| Kevin Nealon | ... | lieutenant |
| Show |
| Dennis Quaid | ... | Henri Hanikierker /Father Christmas |
| Phil Hartman | ... | announcer Voice |
| Mike Myers | ... | Dieter#8 |
| Chris Rock | ... | Paul Jones /Black Pete |
♬Kraftwerk - "Electric Café"
| Film | SchillerVision Theatre Christmas Spectacular |
| Michael J. Anderson | ... | kid |
| Andy Murphy | ... | Santa Claus |
| Tom Schiller | ... | Able Johnson |
| Tom Schiller | ... | Trevor Duncan#2 |
| Total Appearances | Characters | Impressions | Voices | Stills | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Dennis Quaid | 7 | ||||
| The Neville Brothers | 2 | ||||
| Jon Lovitz | 1 | 1 | |||
| Robin Ruzan | 1 | ||||
| Michael J. Anderson | 1 | ||||
| Andy Murphy | 1 | ||||
| John Henry Kurtz | 1 | 1 | |||
| Dana Carvey | 3 | 1 | 1 | ||
| Phil Hartman | 5 | 1 | |||
| Jan Hooks | 4 | 1 | |||
| Victoria Jackson | 5 | ||||
| Dennis Miller | 1 | ||||
| Mike Myers | 4 | 2 | |||
| Kevin Nealon | 4 | ||||
| Chris Farley | 1 | 1 | |||
| Chris Rock | 1 | ||||
| Julia Sweeney | 2 | ||||
| A. Whitney Brown | |||||
| Al Franken | |||||
| Rob Schneider | 1 | ||||
| David Spade | |||||
| William Clotworthy | 1 | 1 | |||
| Don Pardo | 2 | 2 | |||
| Adam Sandler | 1 | ||||
| Tom Schiller | 1 | 1 | |||
| 50 | 6 | 2 | 4 | 1 |