| Award Show | The First Annual Gutenberg Awards |
| Michael Keaton | ... | David Green |
| Chris Farley | ... | Norman Schwarzkopf |
| Phil Hartman | ... | Gabriel García Márquez |
| Kevin Nealon | ... | Robert Fulghum |
| Rob Schneider | ... | Billy Crystal |
| Julia Sweeney | ... | Susan Sontag |
| Ellen Cleghorne | ... | Alice Walker |
| Melanie Hutsell | ... | Kitty Kelley |
| Don Pardo | ... | announcer Voice |
| Ryan Shiraki | ... | Norman Ng |
| Bonnie Turner | ... | Gail Skolnick |
| Terry Turner | ... | Ian MacDonald |
⁕In reruns, part of the Kevin Nealon and Julia Sweeney portion of this sketch is replaced with the dress rehearsal version.