| Sketch | Tough Guy |
| Alec Baldwin | ... | Jack Wilcox |
| Jimmy Fallon | ... | soldier |
| Will Ferrell | ... | soldier |
| Darrell Hammond | ... | soldier |
| Darrell Hammond | ... | epilogue narrator Voice |
| Chris Kattan | ... | soldier |
| Tracy Morgan | ... | soldier |
| Chris Parnell | ... | soldier |
| Rachel Dratch | ... | soldier |
| Jerry Minor | ... | Pete |